To help me be non-judgmental when I am coaching or training… I think of another one of the NLP presuppositions… “Behind every behavior is a positive intention.” I ask myself… “What is the positive intent behind that behavior?” and sometimes I have to go to… “What on earth could be the positive intent behind that behavior?” Most times the behavior does not resonate with my values or morals… but it’s not about me… and there is a positive intent.
I noticed that when I ask myself that question… I am automatically in a place of curiosity or wonderment… not in a place of judgment or condemnation. Judgment and condemnation are not a good place to be to coach or train from… Curiosity and wonderment are a much more resourceful place to come from.
This brings me to another presupposition of NLP which comes from Systems Thinking… The element in a system with the most flexibility will be the controlling element. Being in a place of curiosity and wonderment give me alot of flexibility.