Today marks a significant milestone… 2020 will be over in just a few hours. This year has been one that we’ll look back on in years to come and marvel at how we made it through everything. And, we’ll pause to remember all our friends and family that, sadly didn’t make it through 2020.
I distinctly remember this week in 2019 and all the plans for 2020 many of which I couldn’t do because of circumstances outside of my control. But, I know that there were three things that I could control and it’s the same three things we call can control.
- I can control my thinking, my thoughts and my attitude
- I can control my feelings and my emotions
- I can control my behaviors and my actions
As it turns out those are the three things that all of us are also responsible for controlling. They make up our circle of responsibility. I’ve learned over my years, and that’s a lot, that they aren’t always that easy to control. For me personally the challenges come from controlling my thoughts.
Our thoughts are where everything comes from: the emotions that move us to action, or not and how we do the things we do. For me, when I’m not thinking resourcefully, which happens from time to time and has happened more than I’d like to admit in the past, my mood is driven down and I don’t take the correct or moving forward actions that I should take to provide for my family.
A few years ago, my thoughts were not in a good or healthy place and luckily, Cathy reached out to our very good friend, Klaus Boettcher. Klaus is one of my NLP mentors and he has a private therapy practice on the North Shore in Chicago. In his private practice he helps clients, couples, teams and families realize the all the many resources they really have and how to call upon them as needed. Klaus and I had a couple of sessions over the phone and shortly thereafter things began to improve.
Things began to improve when I took responsibility for my thoughts and became more and more aware of how my thoughts impacted everything else. I knew this before but I knew them at a “I know this level,” not at a “I do this level.” It was the actual action of knowing, doing and working to improve.
Maybe that’s why my favorite quote is by Carl Jung: “Until we make the unconscious, conscious it will control our life and we will call it fate.” To me this quote says so much! Work to become more aware of your thoughts. Notice them. Document them. I urge you to work like hell to trick force or urge yourself have better thoughts. Do whatever it takes.
“Until we make the unconscious, conscious it will control our life and we will call it fate.”
For me, gratitude, moves my thoughts to a much better and resourceful place. I think about the things, the people, the thoughts and the progress that I’m grateful for. I journal about the things I’m grateful for and I am a work in progress and learning that I control my thoughts so they don’t control me. I remember too that a work in progress is still progress.
As we enter the new year, my challenge to you is to become more aware of your thoughts because they truly do begin a chain reaction that if you don’t control them, they will certainly control you.
No matter what 2021 brings to our table, how we think about the situation will go a long way to determine the outcomes we receive. Your thoughts determine your feelings and your feelings determine your actions and your actions determine your results.
Who is coaching you on your thoughts?